So the Republicans Had a Debate Last Night

Yay! Another debate! It had been almost twelve seconds without a Republican Primary debate. I was beginning to go through withdrawal! (Please note that you may be in the throes of Republican Primary debate withdrawal if you experience any of the following symptoms: Joy, smiling, a creeping sense of hope for the nation's future.)

I'm sure there's a transcript somewhere, but who cares, amirite? Official Shakeville Transcript: Taxes, Reagan, illegals, Jesus, bootstraps, taxes, Obama stinks.

The most exciting thing about last night's debate was that Rick Perry, who is definitely still IN IT TO WIN IT, promised to get back in the game. He's gonna go big or go home, because he didn't come here to make friends. True Fact: Rick Perry believes he's on a reality show.

Some other highlights from (I hope you're sitting down) the last (definitely totally for sure) Republican Primary debate of 2011 (sob!):

Mitt Romney tells Newt Gingrich he's rich and zany RIGHT TO HIS FACE! Oh snap!



Newt Gingrich leads everyone in a rousing singalong of "Funkytown."



"Raise your hand if you are a paternalistic fuckbrained bigot whose name rhymes with Zanblorum."